SELF LOVE: Do you know what makes you happy?

I am sharing this here to encourage you to identify the things that make you feel happy and to be deliberate about investing in them. This is self care/ self love and it is part of the key of LOVE without this we cannot experience complete deliverance.

My flower vase:

Some time ago I decided to be deliberate about the things that make me happy.

Life can throw at us so many things that have the potential to make us unhappy right? I had lost myself…. and did not even know consciously what MAKES ME HAPPY.

So I prayed about it and asked Holy Spirit to show me. Being deliberate about the things he showed me helped me maintain my peace and joy. So one of the things that make me happy are FLOWERS. I began to fill my flower vase with wildflowers which  I cut from around my neighborhood; then something beautiful happened. Jesus began to send me flowers through other people, even people whom I had never told I like flowers. Jesus is so cool. I believe Holy Spirit was partnering with me to help me learn HOW TO LOVE  MYSELF.

(100) Deliverance From Spirit Husband and Spirit Wife. – YouTube

 The years of narcissistic abuse had taken their toll on me and I was caught in a spiral of people pleasing. In an attempt to get acceptance from the people in my family whose approval was like a drug to me, I had neglected and refused to accept God’s love towards me.

One day in my daily devotional time as I was crying out to God for deliverance from severe anxiety, depression and from spirit spouse visits (Incubus). I came across Mark 12:31, which says “Love your neighbor as yourself” immediately I felt Holy spirit begin to convict me and to tell me “You do not love yourself, Sharon you are disobeying my commandment and you need to repent, for if you have not received my love for you, how can I use you to give pure love to another” I immediately began to sob uncontrollably.

As I repented before God and began to repeat over and over again, ” I receive your love for me Jesus” I literally felt some of the heaviness in my chest and heart palpitations I had been feeling slowly start to ease off. I admitted to Holy spirit that I did not even understand fully what he was trying to tell me. He responded by leading me through months of meditating and confessing psalm 139:13 which states; For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. This verse was powerful in helping me defeat a spirit of rejection which had been preventing me from recieving God’s love and loving myself. From this verse, I got the revelation that I have a heavenly parent who created me and who formed me and put me in my mother’s womb. He cannot but love you dear one he carefully created you and decided to bring you to life. Think about this……

In my future devotional moments to come, Holy spirit led me through a series of prayers of healing and began to ask me even throughout my day “Sharon what makes you happy?” The answer to this question was the key to learning to know myself and to love myself. I started to discover what makes me happy and also what makes me unhappy.

 God gave me the grace to stay away from toxic people whom I was unable to detach from in the past because I thought I needed their love.  I had grace to endure the period of loneliness that this change required without having a mental break down, I was satisfied with God’s love, Hallelujah I could feel his love and it was enough. Engaging in the things which made me happy kept me fulfilled as God’s love flowed from within me to me. Eventually with the toxic relationships gone, God was able to bring real loving God centered ones in. As the negative soul ties from the toxic relationships broke off my life so did the chains of the spirit spouse. 

 Most people think having a spirit spouse is some weird, complicated issue but it is simply being covenanted to any other spirit which is not the spirit of Jesus Christ and finding coping skills inspired by that spirit, to deal with life’s difficulties; eventually that spirit will have the power to control your life negatively because you are in obedience to it. Jesus Christ wants to be the only spirit entity inspiring our coping skills to deal with life’s difficulties. James 4:5 states, He jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us.

Holy spirit showed me I had married a “people pleasing spirit ” which is a spirit of idolatry, and has a root in fear and pride.  I was desperately looking for the love only God could give me in people and sacrificing myself for other people’s approval so I could soothe the pain I felt from narcissistic abuse. These people would reject me and I would end up even more broken than before I met them.  God led me to renounce all these spirits and ask for forgiveness and healing in all the wounded places within me.

  You see, God does not hold us responsible for narcissistic abuse, or any other pain which was done to us, but he holds us responsible for receiving our healing. He is Jehovah Rapha, he is a healer God, and he is faithful. If we will make time before him to be quiet and search our hearts in humility with the light of his word, he will work with us to bring healing to our souls, so that we can be his channel of healing and love toward others. 

 So, I will ask you again; you who are my kind? What makes you happy? Take a week or two to prayerfully ask God to reveal to you the things that truly make you happy not those which you are using to numb the pain of emotional trauma. You might find just like me that this a very big part of the cure to the panic attacks, the depressive episodes and the spirit spouse visits that you have been searching for.

While you are in that devotional space listen to “7 Songs from Heaven” as you pray (there is a link for you to listen at the top of this page); those are the songs based on the 7 keys from the word of God that HolySpirit sang over me as he pulled back the layers of pain and brought me deliverance.He will do same for you in Jesus’ name. I suggest LOVE SONG for this blog post, You can also find it on my Youtube channel.  It will help you to declare your love toward God in response to his love for you strengthening your covenant with God  and weakening and destroying any other covenant with evil spirits. As you listen to the song, bind and cast out of your life any demonic spirits preventing you from loving yourself in Jesus’s name.

Happy healing dear one.

Love

 Sharon Mbi